I spent the weekend at the Tired Dog Ranch, my friends’ B&B ranch in Oakridge, Oregon. There were five of us visiting so Saturday morning I slipped out of bed, grabbed some coffee and headed out to the pasture alone.
Piggy Jim met me at the gate, his tail wagging. I hadn’t met him before, but he was happy to see me. He wanted my coffee. His snout perfectly fit my coffee cup.
I reached down to pet him and he snorted and backed up.
Do you mind? he snorted.
I’m sorry, I said. What did I do?
You pet me like a dog. I am not a dog.
Sorry, sorry. I said. Would you like some more coffee?
Yes. He said. Yes I would.
One more snorty slurp of coffee.
I asked, Hey, can you show me how you like to be pet?
Scratch me on my side, but lightly.
I gave a little scratch. He had tight muscles running down his back.
I scratched him all over with a light touch, and then I switched to a strong rub.
Piggy Jim said, Oh yeah, that’s nice.
I said, Is there anything you want to tell me? Any advice or insight?
Piggy Jim said, Naw. Rub my thighs.
I gave that little piggy a massage. I couldn’t help but think of those thighs as hams, which now means that I’m this much closer to becoming a vegetarian.
Piggy Jim drank a little more of my coffee. When the coffee was gone, he went on his way.
Later, our friend Laura brought Piggy Jim a hula hoop, which he really liked. He picked it up. with his mouth and tossed it around like he had no idea how cute he was.
I love a pig that likes what he likes, and doesn’t worry about much more than that.